Shepard Bliss Horse Tale


My boyfriend Reuben and I ran into his friend, a retired hippie, former environmentalist who is now a gardener and uses his land as an educational center to college, high school, and grammar students.

He noticed my horse necklace, and complimented me then mentioned this movie called, “Have you seen Horse Dancer? Great, wonderful film”, as Shepard Bliss describes it in his gay encroaching manner of us completely unaware of this “Horse Dancer” film.  He goes on….,” It’s just amazing what this girl does with the horse, all these gymnastic tricks, you both have to watch it.”

Reuben always carries a notepad and pen on him to write down “enticing” things like this event because he doesn’t want to forget.

Reuben grabs his notepad and pen, “shit my pen ink leaked! Norine would you have a pen on you!?”  “Don’t worry I’ll remember the title.” Reuben eagerly attempts to rub off his ink-stained fingers on the lawn near us, in the meantime, Shepard Bliss then makes his escape to Whole Foods and states, “yeah great movie, I better be on my way, catch you later!”  Reuben yells, “Shepard I’ll see you at your place to buy some of your Blackberries!” Shepard disappears a few feet and into the Grocery Store.

A few hours later when we return from the farmers market I was looking forward to watching Horse Dancer, Shepard got me excited, and how I’ve been waiting to watch this ‘wonderful’ film.

Two minutes into the movie, shitty actors, the girl is stuck up..” okay let’s keep watching I’m sure the movie will turn around!”, feeling optimistic. Twenty, then thirty, then Forty-five minutes later- drama, no horse action, and Reuben saying “Dude where are the horse tricks, there’s only chick drama- Is Shepard serious!?”

We were disappointed, yet we were wondering “Was Shepard fucking serious!?”

This movie has no depth and only two minutes of the horses taking the credit.

Afterward, I couldn’t help but glance over at Reubens’ fingers and notice that ink stain from earlier.  I pointed it out to Reuben, we both started to laugh over this ludicrous day.

Shepard Bliss has a name for a good reason. Let me further explain his airy calm synergistic demeanor, that Reuben and I were suckered into, like a successful sales person selling a shitty quality vacuum! Yet he sold us on his smile and words! He goes by Shepard Bliss for a reason! He must have been stoned like a hammer-head during the film while watching over his grandkids.

When we go to his place to get some berries we’ll have to mention his horse-tale and the poorly directed film he had recommended to us!

I suppose we all have crossed paths of those who we would consider a Shepard Bliss, though I have learned a youthful yet cheerful message, Wherever we are in whatever situation we come upon, don’t take things at a face value.

Thank you, Shepard Bliss,  Zen master at knowing how to create humor in the world around him!

Will keep you posted on Shepard Bliss!


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